When It's Worse For The Better (Bullying & Abuse)

Welcome back to my pathetic life I call The 99 Problems of Maya Hart. As you can all see, I've reactivated my blog and Google+ profile (plus.google.com/MayaHart14) and I just wanted to announce to all my old viewers that I'm back. Thanks for being there for me, all of you. And now back to the show.

So the past 24 hours for me were terrible to a point that you would'nt believe. My mom has been a bit off lately, not sure why, I'm guessing she's still feeling a bit...a bit something, out of whack since my seeing my dad for the first time in 9 years. The way he left us was like extremely unexpected. He said he'd be back in an hour and just never came back. How pathetic is that. So anyway, I've been spending more time at Riley's lately because my mom just needs her space. So last night, Riley and I were with Shawn watching Girl Meets Yearbook. My mind likes to do the talking for me, so whenever I compare my life now with how it was in Girl Meets World, I realize it's not like that at all and suddenly become angry with everyone around me, though they haven't done anything in specific that they know about. One minute I'm fine with them, the next I'm angry at them because of what they are compared to what they're supposed to be, just because my mind tells me I should be mad at them, that I shoudn't just accept that terrible version of my life and live with it. So I decide not to and begin to unexpectedly hate on them, nobody can really predict when it happens. It just gets to me, that they don't treat me or each other the way they should, the way they did. It's wrong and at random points I decide not to take it. So with that said, after watching Girl Meets The New Teacher before we watched the yearbook one, I saw how it was then, realized it wasn't the way it should be and became angry at everybody but Shawn. Because not everybody is being abnormal towards me. Shawn isn't, my mom isn't (when I do see her), Farkle isn't, Zay isn't. So it just seems like everything is collpasing because it's the most important people who are doing that to me. Most of them aren't, when I think about it. Actually it's mostly Riley and sometimes Lucas who does it to me 99.9% of the time. But Riley is my best friend and I've loved Lucas for two years and we're good friends too. So it just hits me harder when it's them doing it compared to if it were Zay or Farkle. Even though Farkle is apart of the infinte friend group I loved so much, I didn't have that spot for him like I did for Lucas because I secretly liked him, and Riley because we're supposedly supposed to be best friends. So when watching Girl Meets Yearbook, Riley and I began fighting and sushing turned into yelling which turned into hitting, kicking and screaming. She kicked me about 25 times, and when I did it back, she screamed her freaking head off. Mrs Matthews came and broke it up, screamed and attacked me, not Riley. It was freaking even! She did it first, I just defended myself and I get into trouble?! They've got a terrible system going here. So then I decided to pack all my stuff and run away to the police station. As I packed, Shawn told me I was making the biggest mistake of my life. He ran away as a teenager/kid too, so he'd know. I ignored his advice and left into the pitch black at 9:00 at night. Shawn followed me, fearing my safety and told me if I was going to the police station, he was not coming with me. When we got there, it was closed. CLOSED! At 5:00 on weekdays. Who closes a police station at 5? Everyone knows most crimes are committed at night! My word! So anyway, Mrs Matthews came to get me and I refused to go with her, joining Shawn again and heading to Shoppers Drug Mart to call the police there. When I got there, the people at Shoppers called 911 and the police came about a half hour later. In that half hour, I talked to the girl who was 22, she worked there and told me about her working hours and how everything works and stuff. The police guy came and took me to his car. I got to sit in the back of a police car (again) and he recorded me telling the story (for some strange reason). Then he took me back to The Matthews' because I told him I couldn't go home to my mom. He talked with Mrs Matthews and they brought me back inside for the night. After I unpacked, Farkle came over because Mr Matthews had called Minkus and told him, Farkle got worried and came to see if I was okay. I held Farkle's hand and cried as I told him the story. In the morning, everything was back to normal...well as normal as it started. They always say, it's gonna get worse before it gets better. Oh and it did.

Except it could get worse than running away and calling the police at 10 at night. At school, they didn't make it much easier for me. Science class went pretty good. I just touched up my drawings and did nothing while my friend studied. In gym class, her and I were playing badminton. I had a fight with my other "friend" (can't name names anymore) on Facebook over Christmas break, first day off of school and we didn't speak for thr rest of the break. She started it and threatened me by calling me mentally unhealthy and both of us may have said some things I cannot repeat. So in gym class today, her ball rolled over by me so I kicked it in the other direction, thinking it was the one the girls on the court were using. It wasn't. She gave me the "what the heck?!" look when I realized it was her ball. So I unintentionally offended her and I found that hilarious because I hate her anyway. So for the rest of the class, she was giving me the death stare like every minute or two and wouldn't stop looking at me. #GetALife, for one. And then she sent her friend over to talk to me about why I was so mad. Her friend told me what she said about the situation and I agreed, that is what happened, but I told her I wanted nothing to do with her ever again. I don't want to apologize, I don't want her to apologize, I don't want to even look at her again. I'm fed up with her crap and I'm done tolerating her and how she thinks she's so much better than me and sooo powerful and crap. So then for the rest of gym class, she was trying to come up to me and yell at me, I knew it. She made every chance she had to approach me and gave me like a horrifying fear for my social life and well-being, so I made it my ultimate mission to avoid her at all costs. Everytime she walked in my direction, I turned the other way or stood near the teacher. Everyone went to change, including her, and so I waited for her to get out of the changeroom before I went in because I knew she'd find that as her oppertunity to slash me while no teacher was around. When she got out, I went in and then she came back in and hungout in the changeroom, already changed. Like seriously? She stands next to me while we're fighting to show off the crap she don't have or something. Like, get away from me, I don't wanna be near you, go show off to the other sluts looking for attention like yourself, hun. I was terrified to walk down the halls from that point on, I couldn't get out of the same room as her fast enough. At lunch, I told the art teacher what had happened and she said she'd talk to the counsellor. I called Mrs Matthews and said I couldn't be in the same class with her anymore, so she oddly didn't even try to convince me to stay and came and brought me home. I couldn't take it anymore, I was finished. I had last period with her again and I couldn't do it. So that class is going on right now actually, and because she's apparently so powerful, I can't even go to class anymore. Nice. This will be dealt with on Monday. She will leave me alone or I'm going to move schools for god's sake. Which probably won't happen and they'll have her get her ugly face out of my face. My mom literally told me she's seen her before and thinks she's goddamn ugly as hell. I agree, she looks like an elf. Too bad she isn't because then I wouldn't have to see her til Christmas :D

Well anyway, my life has been a trainwreck in the past 24 hours so I hope now is when it gets better. We'll see. Thanks for reading The 99 Problems of Maya Hart and be sure to check back soon. In the meantime, watch Girl Meets World on Disney Channel!

Show No Mercy, Maya

Welcome back to the pathetic blog that is my life. I'm here right now to ultimately give up on everything reguading people. People, people, people. I can't take it no more. My friends will never be the same as we used to be. My family is a hopeless wreck. Shawn will get back together with his ex-girlfriend and my mom and me, will be my mom and me. I want my friends back. My old friends from school, that horrible girl who I messed with pretty hard yesterday, I just want her to disappear from my life. My actual friends? Well I'm finished with them. I know Lucas loves me, even if it's just as a friend, he just doesn't show it. And Farkle, well he can't show it. And don't get me started with Riley. She and I will only be the same (GMW/The MayaLife) on TV and in my dreams. They only care about me when it's in their best interest. They only hold my hand, stand by me, are positive towards me when it's in their best interest, when there's something more than being my friend in it for them. My entire social life is based off of what people can use me for. They don't care about me because I'm me. Nobody cares that I love my friends with all my heart because they're my friends and they're just them. That doesn't matter anymore, were not the same people we were on TV and we will never be again. It's horrific. I'm finished with them. I'll attempt to maybe get back in with my old friends for some comfort but I'm doubting it'll actually happen. I'm gonna repeat "I don't care" in my head as many times as it takes to convince myself that I don't need my "friends" to be happy. Maybe I'll find best friendship in Sarah possibly. She's with Darby, which might cause my plan to blow up once agai, but it's worth a dang shot, I've got not a thing to lose here no more. I just want Lucas. He's the only one who's sincerely convinced me to believe he cares about me at any given time in the past week or two. Everyone else, I never bought their cheap act. So I'm done taking being used as friendship. I'm not that low, in not that desperate and I ain't gonna take no more. I'm not gonna pretend to be friends because of anything were doing for you, because I'm not being used. I'm done with that and they've got no choice but to accept it. Nothing were doing any day will make me act like everything is okay just to come back home and it be like I was used for their own happiness on some damn trip. I'm done, unless it's real, I ain't faking happiness and friendship anymore. Maya Hart doesn't let people use her, and I ain't letting this go any further. Done done done. Enough said.

Girl Meets New Years Resolutions: The MayaLife

What you are about to witness is not for the good-of-heart but for the great-of-heart! The new-old Maya is back in the brand new adventure as of 2016! This is... The MayaLife!

Okay now let's get real here. Welcome back to the strong pathetisism I'd like to call, The 99 Problems of Maya Hart! I'd like to welcome all of you to join The 99 Problems of Maya Hart in this here journey 2016 will take me on. It's New Year's Day, and with New Years comes resolutions that absolutely nobody ever keeps. If you've ever kept a New Years resolutions, kudos to you my friend. Anywho, what I'm here to talk about today is MY New Years resolution that I am hoping for and planning on keeping overly. That resolution is The MayaLife! What is The MayaLife, you might ask? Well that is what I'm about to get into right about now...

The MayaLife. A beautiful beautiful place that I haven't lived in for a long time now. The MayaLife is kind of like Mayaville but not exactly. Mayaville is the place where I live. The place of no rules, the place of freedom, the place of darkness where you can do whatever you want. The MayaLife is the way I live my life. How o act, the things I say, what I keep inside, what I tell other people, they way I treat my friends and the way they treat me. I haven't been living The MayaLife to its fullest lately, and as of New Years I've made it my goal to do that.

The MayaLife, as we know it, is my actions, words and mindset. Well let us compare how I'm living now to The MayaLife. What EXACTLY is the way to live The MayaLife to its fullest? I've got 3 word for ya: Girl Meets World. That's tigt, exactly how I and the rest of us, do things in Girl Meets World, our reality TV show that brings inner peace to my darkened and hurt soul. I'm betting most of you have seen Girl Meets World, if not, this might be harder to follow but it's not 100% necessary to know. In GMW, I had friends. REAL friends. Friends who had my back, friends who CARED about me. I emphasize that word and you'll see why very soon. Most importantly, I had a best friend. I had Riley Matthews, the REAL Riley Matthews. The way she was on GMW. That I miss like you wouldn't believe. She's pushed me away a lot lately and we've lost most of what we had. She's been negative towards me and hasn't exactly cared about how I feel like she used to. She doesn't rely on me like she used to, she doesn't be the way she used to with me. She's got most of her love on Farkle now. All she cares about is Farkle and on those occasions, her and Huckleberry are pretty tight in terms of friendship and being there for each other. Me and her, are not the same at all. Inseparable was separated, people. I thought whenever I was hurt or anything along that line, she would be there. I've had some of the biggest cries of my life in the past week and most of the time, actually every time, she cared not at all. It was always Farkle, Shawn or even Lucas on one occasion. She just doesn't love me like she used to and that hurts like you wouldn't believe. I just want my best friend back, my OLD best friend. I don't want this new thing anymore. I want my old Riley, who would've done anything for me. Now she's replaced me with Farkle and occasionally Lucas. I know in saying "occasionally" a lot but stay with me here, the dictionary is only so big, people. I want the Girl Meets World Riley back. I miss the old her. And don't get me wrong, I ain't an angel at this game either. That's exactly what I'm getting into next ;)

Me. Maya Hart. 15 years old this January. I'd say I've grown a lot over the past year, but not as much as I was hoping to. I've changed my look and gained a little bit of hope. (You can definitely say too much hope). The point is, we've discovered a lot about me lately. I really have. Yes, I've had a brief crush on Lucas for 2 years. I kept it inside because Riley likes him. But over the past two years I thought I would get over it. But I never did. It only grew. Eventually everyone found out while we were in Texas. Now the secrets out, and I don't have to carry it around anymore. I've always thought of Lucas and Riley as brother and sister. I just didn't want to hurt her by saying it. But now that everyone knows I like Lucas, I can't keep it inside anymore. I just can't. So now there's been this huge love triangle and I've kind of been in a bad mood lately because Lucas doesn't like me and it hurts to hear him say to my face that he likes Riley like that and not me. So about 2 days ago and long before that, I haven't been able to be happy because Lucas payed no attention to me. But the one day, I was randomly able to force myself to move on. Well I still like Lucas, of course. When he touches me at all, my heart lights up. But I'm not feeling so desperate anymore. But now I have missing Riley to cause my negativity to continue and not stop as I was hoping it would when I was able to chill my desperate need for Lucas to care about me. That the thing with us now. We just don't care. Actually no. Farkle and I care very much about all of us. Riley and Lucas don't. That not apart of The MayaLife and neither is the negativity me or anyone else has been showing. I just want my friends and myself back. That's where The MayaLife lies. I'm going back to The MayaLife. Even if nobody is coming with me, I'm making me the person I used to be. That's my New Years resolution. Thanks for reading The 99 Problems of Maya Hart and be sure to check out Girl Meets World on Disney Channel!

The Truth

This is the post where I absolutely cannot lie. You can disagree with me all you want, but I swear on the pathetic bit of life I have, I will tell nothing but the truth as this post goes on. And it goes on..

So we watched Teen Beach 2 tonight, Riley and I. All was well, normal. Earlier today is when Farkle and I officially decided to move on from our crushes on Riley and Lucas. No, it's not 100% working yet, but I'm doing a lot better than I thought I would be. Yes I miss him and would still do anything to fix things between us but I'm strong enough to possibly see myself moving on going into the next year. One year ago, I was stuck in a situation that was the opposite-ish of how it is now. Yes, I still wanted to move on from Lucas but I couldn't. But I didn't wanna move on because he didn't like me. I wanted to move on because I thought we had gone too far. And yes, we did. When January came around, we only went too far maybe two times. I was able to refrain myself from liking him like that by January. And maybe that's what'll be happening again this year, considering now is really the first time in a week that I've actually tried to move on and am not actually pretending to this time. So maybe I'll be able to officially move on ENOUGH to be okay with him hating me like he does. And yeah, I believe he really dislikes me for real now. And maybe that's because he made a really hurtful statement toward me today and claimed to not remember anything that happened on confession night, which I know he does remember, he just doesn't want to admit that he ever lied about liking me. Because we all know he said it. I know it, you know it. Do not lie to my face, especially when I we both know the truth. So I am currently avoiding him at all costs. Not seeing him at all will contribute hugely to moving on. I don't care if he and Riley get all hooked during the episode break containing this damn love triangle. I could care less but I don't care enough to get jealous unless I see it. So, avoiding Lucas will be avoiding them both together which again, will contribute hugely to my moving on plan. Riley and Farkle, well that's another story right about now. I've ultimately convinced Farkle that the two of us are "desperate" toward Lucas and Riley so Farkle has made it his mission to appear as careless as possible, which I can't determine if its true or not, him not caring and all. But I don't care enough to ask. See? I'm really teaching myself not to care much, as you can see. I've been saying "I don't care" a lot today. And honestly, I'm slowly beginning to mean it. Which is part of my goal so that's magnificent for me. Yay. Now Riley's upset that Farkle doesn't seem to give a rip about nothing but according to her, it's not because she likes him, it's because she likes him as a friend. Boom! #Friendzoned. Which would be more important to this story if Farkle cared a bit more. But he doesn't care if she friendzones him or not, so.. Because whether she likes him or not, he friendzoned her too. So that's where they're at. 

Riley and I don't seem to be on much of better terms than the rest of us are. After watching the movie, we were to walk to the store to grab something for Mrs Matthews. As soon as we left her apartment, we walked in bitter silence, but still together. And not the good, heart-touching silence, but the awkward bitter silence. When we got out of the building, I walked distantly ahead of her, in the dark, by myself. I could hear her footsteps faintly in the distance but didn't bother to care. I just thought to myself for a bit, walking in the dark silence about a meter or two ahead of her. "I'm not even needed on this trip" I told myself. "I'm just the one walking in the front with no money, maybe I should be in the back" I thought. "I'm Maya Hart, I'm always in the lead, standing tall, in the front, with no money at all" I reminded myself. "any other arragement would be wrong" I decided. When I got to the store, I waited a few seconds for Riley because I didn't know exactly what we were getting. We paid, and as we left the store, I regained my position of walking ahead. That time, I was a lot further ahead than I was on the first walk. I could hardly hear Riley's footsteps under the sound of my own, my feet crunching above the snow. I didn't look back, not once. Looking back is just getting stuck in the past, which is not where I wanted to go, so I didn't. It was addictive, but I still refused to look back for a short second, because that would've hurt my entire future for more than a short second. When we got home, after a few seconds I heard that sweet voice I loved so much, unexpectedly calling my name, I turned to see her bright and beautiful face holding her smartphone in her little over-worked hands, as she showed the screen to my face, she had a picture referencing on of our episodes (my least favourite for the record) comparing to Boy Meets World. All suddenly made sense reguading that scene. Anywho, things have changed but not for the better, but for the worse. Last night, I was determined to fix whatever was going on between us then, so I went to Riley who was grieving over her passed hamster's old cage and I hugged her from behind. She touched my arm for a second before pushing me away, and continuing to talk to Lucas about her hamster. They walked away, not saying a word to me, hurting what was already broken. Farkle took me by the hand and told me I tried, in which I began to sob my eyes out. He didn't talk to me much within that hour before leaving me to sleep alone. I cried for a while until I calmed myself down before going to sleep. Rejection was and still is my biggest fear. I faced it and got hurt like I did when my dad left. The feeling was similar. Which that was the hardest moment of my entire childhood. It shaped who I am, hugely. And especially who I was. Now, I just want everything to be okay. I feel lost and missing something without knowing I have someone I can go to no matter what. My insides panic like you wouldn't believe because I've had that security for years. Now it's gone and I feel unprotected and now that I'm unprotected, something is going to come and hit home hard. Now that I have nowhere to go to, nobody to cry to, I'll really need it for no other reason than that I don't have that anymore. Feeling hurt, the feeling is familiar. But unprotected, this is all new and most definitely feels wronger than wrong. But if I can handle losing my dad, I'll be able to cope with this somehow. It only took me 9 years to stop being angry towards my dad, so I'll be in ship shape 9 years from now. Wish me luck, I need it more than anything in the world right now. Don't forget to check back soon and watch Girl Meets World on Disney Channel.

Missed Moving On

Sup losers? So today was an interesting day to start off with. All four of us (Riley, Lucas, Farkle and I) got into huge fights. I bawled my eyes out for an hour last night because of Lucas and mostly Riley and then this morning was even worse. We've been teamed up for the past 24 hours; Riley and Lucas vs Farkle and I. So then all four of us ended up having it with our partner and Farkle and I started screaming at each other and so did Lucas and Riley. Then eventually Smackle tried to stop Farkle and I from fighting when Mrs Matthews came home and invited Eric to once again sort out all our problems. When Eric arrived, he got us all to sit in a circle and asked who fired the first shot. Nobody could remember how it started and Eric then found this entire thing ridiculous realizing we didn't even know why we were so mad. Farkle and I both claimed that neither of us knew how or why it started but we were aware why we were still upset. I was tired of nobody caring about each other like we used to and Lucas lying to me about liking me. Then he claimed that he never said that and I blew up. I know he remembered saying that 2 nights ago when we were doing confessions. How could anyone forget that!? Then when I questioned that, he claimed he didn't remember because he didn't care enough to. That honestly broke my heart, he actually admitted that he didn't care about me, meaning everything said on confession night was made up. I knew it was for the past 2 days but I didn't expect to hear it out loud! It really hurt and I was honestly planning to move on to something or someone else before I heard that. But hearing that he didn't care about me made me care all the more. Which I know makes no sense but love never makes sense so suck it. I then realized that I still didn't wanna lose everything so I went out to make sure I'd get my Riley back to normal. Luckily that actually worked for once and everything went back to normal between us. We all went to Topanga's expect for Lucas and we also brought Charlie instead. So to was Charlie, Riley, Farkle and I at Topnaga's. My mom wasn't there because her shift didn't start for another hour or so. Farkle and I decided we were going to officially move on from Riley and Lucas and maybe even like each other again considering Girl Meets Money is rumoured to be big on us. I did like him briefly last summer but I've sworn never to speak of it again unless necessary. And at this point, to move on from Lucas, it just might be necessary. Anyway, then Riley began leading Farkle on to her at Topanga's and made this whole moving on thing an awful lot harder especially for Farkle. I'll try and pull Farkle away from her like I did then but I'm not sure it'll work. Maybe this will be the one thing that I can hope for that might actually happen. Ya never know. So thanks for catching up on The 99 Problems of Maya Hart and be sure to watch Girl Meets World on Disney Channel! 

Suck It Up, Princess

I see you're still reading my little blog here. If you're really that interested, fine. If you found my last post interesting, you're gonna wanna fasten your seatbelt for this one.

Christmas went pretty goodactually. After the whole last night scene (read "Dark Christmas 2015" if you don't know)

I actually managed to turn it around. I realized my job was to protect Riley, not hurt her, so I saved her the deal of sleeping on the couch but abandoning the fight we had. I got a lot of great things from Shawn and the Matthews' for Christmas this year, very thankful. Then comes this:

I was messaging my good friend, Ellie who's from China on Twitter. I wrote one of my usual broken love quotes on my Twitter, @MayaPHart, and she oddly responded. What it said was "You love her, I love you, this triangle is nothing but abused" exact words. She responded asking if it were Lucas I was referring to. Me, of course, being all defensive about my crush on Lucas, asked why she would think that. Eventually she told me that he was the one who told her 90% of my 350+ tweets were about him. I decided to have a nice word with Ranger Rick here, and ask why the heck he'd tell her that. Him and I are still currently messaging on Twitter about it. It's taking a really bad turn right now, I'll be getting back to that once I'm finished this update.

Earlier today, Riley and Lucas simotaneously ganged up on me in a verbal war, leaving me devastated for hours. Him and Riley just keep getting closer and closer which of course, really upsets me. Then she has the guts to post on Twitter that her relationship problems suck. Honey, you don't have relationship problems! She tweeted, "I love you, you love me. I love him, he loves me. Choices are hard" or something along those lines. I'm sorry but I don't go complaining about how my crush likes me back! That's absolutely ridiculous! I'm fed up with those two, and then Lucas has the guts to ask what the heck he did to me. My word, are we for real? Anyway, I've got to go put a couple of morons in their place now. Keep watching for new updates on The 99 Problems of Maya Hart and watch Season 3 of Girl Meets World, coming soon to Disney Channel.

Dark Christmas 2015

Hey Blogger! I know I haven't posted in about 6-8 months now, but if you watched Season 2 of Girl Meets World, you'd know I've been pretty busy lately. So, I think we need to catch up but first of all, Merry Christmas! It's Christmas Eve, 9:17PM and Christmas is only hours away. Meanwhile, I spend it here at Riley's house being completely rejected by the entire family, crying in her bedroom in the dark by myself. That's my Christmas Eve, hope really is for suckers. Anyway, it's not all about me. I hope you guys are having a great Christmas Eve. I'm not gonna lie, I did have fun tonight. We went looking at Christmas lights and that was a lot of fun, I was almost laughing the entire time. It was great, highlight of my night. Now Riley's made it really clear to me that she doesn't really wanna do this anymore which is making me feel terrible in itself, but then she accuses me of being negative. No no, it's her. I wanna be here, I'm enjoying myself until I realize I'm a desperate sucker and stop being such a suck-up toward her. I don't wanna be pushed away by her, so I push her away first so she doesn't do it to me, hemps making me feel bad about myself and this entire situation. Yes, I know I'm just beginning to post again and I'm already venting about my problems, but this IS "The 99 Problems of Maya Hart" but I'm pretty sure I've got more than 99 problems. I'm gonna guess 106-107? I dunno, I'm trying okay? 

The point I'm trying to make here is, I just wanted to have a good Christmas, full of cheer and happiness and no negativity whatsoever. I'm happy here, clearly, and everyone knows it too. The only reason I'd have to be negative here is if they are being negative, causing me to feel bad. Which is exactly what is going on here, as well as the entire family ganging up on me. I feel like I'm not wanted here. Why, you ask? Riley literally tweeted on her Twitter (@NYRileyMatthews) "I wish I could spend Christmas with JUST my family" and I'm the only one here who's not really apart of this family. She might as well have tweeted "I wish I could spend Christmas with everyone here but Maya" because that's what I got out of that. That's basically what I read anyway. And she calls me negative. Actually that's fair. I'm in a negative mood. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that she's negative towards me, then tweets about how she wishes she didn't have to spend Christmas with me. Isn't that just lovely? Anyone else seeing the obvious cause of the problem here? Because I can see it and according to everyone, I ain't the brightest bulb in the bucket. So glad to catch up, I'll be writing on here much more often now. I wish everyone a better Christmas than I'm having now. Merry Christmas Blogger!