Riley and me, not talking. Surprised? No, me neither. Riley and Farkle, also not talking. Suprised? Me neither! Man, you're good at this game. Last night. Now this is a story worth telling. Farkle and I are as usual, in our normal bed, talking about Riley, Lucas and the goddamn heartbreak these losers have caused us. We were talking about when back in December, Farkle still was madly in love with Riley (he isn't now, who on earth could love her? Especially if they knew what she does to some people. I'm some people) and didn't wanna support her with her crush, which at the time, was Lucas. Farkle loved Riley and knew I loved Lucas, therefore didn't support her and Lucas and supported me and Lucas because it didn't get in the way of Riarkle. In December, Riley DMed Farkle on Twitter and said she just wanted him to support her in her crush on Lucas and that he was always the one she could go to about that. It was Girl Meets World times ten thousand. She basically begged him for their episodes relationship. Last night Farkle showed me that DM and explained to me how much he regretted not taking that. He was literally being HANDED exactly what he wants now and denied it like a friggin idiot. The next thing I heard was someone else's voice calling Farkle's name and it wasn't me, obviously wasn't him, and I realized quickly it was Riley. Farkle acted as if everything were normal between them and answered "yeah?" all normally. She then told him that she wants their episodes relationship back by telling him to support her again. She came and joined us and began talking and asking Farkle's support about someone else she liked. Now the reason a while back he didn't support her is because he liked her, but mostly because her and Lucas being together hurt me more than it would've hurt Riley if she weren't with him. Now get a load of this. Riley started to tell us that she likes someone else now, not Harry or Lucas. I was sick of hearing about Harry and there's a chance I might still get defensive if it were Lucas so I was glad to hear it was someone new. Nobody I liked and wasn't going to replace Farkle this time. Farkle. Wasn't going to replace FARKLE. So anywho, she said she slightly liked this person as a crush but mostly she liked them as a friend. Sounded somewhat familiar to me. She started talking about this "guy" but refused to tell us who it was. She gave us several hints that Farkle got nothing out of. She kept calling the person by "they" instead of "he" which was weird and it pondered around in my mind for quite some time. Farkle then read my mind, oddly enough and asked Riley why she was saying "they" instead of "he." She said for some people it comes naturally to call them by "they" instead of the gender specific title and said her other crush she only likes 3% because of a dream, Kyle, she said she calls him by "they" and Harry by "he" and it just works that way for certain people. It doesn't. She doesn't refer to Kyle as "they" for one, and nobody calls a single person by "they" unless they have a good reason, for two. Oh and she had a reason alright. I knew it, and wanted to see if Farkle would catch on. He did not. Friggin idiot. So I decided to say something. If I'm gonna tell you who I believed it was, I'm gonna tell you their backstory first. Riley has this friend who is a girl who she's been fighting with for quite some time now. Before that, she called this girl her best friend, I believed because she was trying to make me mad. That's why I thought she was calling this chic her best friend. To make me jealous and mad. Well it did that, but it's much deeper than that. Anyway, her and this chic who actually was a little cunt to me and indirectly said Riley was better than me thinking I couldn't hear her, possibly. She may have meant for me to hear it, I don't know. But that's not important so I'm moving on. Haven't forgiven her, but whatever. So her and Riley have been fighting as well as me and Riley so I didn't talk to Riley, and didn't know much about the fight between these two. One night, Mrs Matthews was angry and forced us to make our own dinner. Riley spoke to us nicely and we all agreed to make dinner together. She was being rather nice to me, Farkle and Smackle were there too. Farkle was telling me it was a trap and she was so fake but I was too relieved to be talking to her again, I didn't care what Farkle had to say about it. I didn't care that she was using me as a matter of fact. Because she was. She definitely was. She used me to talk about her problems. So anyway, later that night she told me about the fight between the two and filled me in on everything I didn't wanna hear, if we're being honest here. So she told me that Riley herself was the one to start the fight between the two of them. She said she might apologize to her. She said no matter how much she hates that girl, she still wanted her to like her for some unknown reason. Or is it? I think I know the reason.. So by the end of the night, I cried, Riley made me cry, what else is new? She's made me cry over 10 times legitimately, over the last week. The next morning she apologized to me on an unrelated note. So now that you know this girl's history, getting back to the last night story now. I decided to say something because Farkle wasn't catching on. "Kim" I said. "Is it Kim?" I asked. She got all defensive and yelled at me. "Even if it is, so what?! Who cares? Whether it is or isn't, it doesn't matter!" she defended. And that's when I knew.
Here are the hints she gave us:
1. They had 2 a's in their first and last name combined.
2. Farkle and I apparently knew their middle name.
3. Including their middle name, their full name had 4 a's in it.
4. They are not white, but not black.
5. Not in Riley's homeroom class.
Those are the ones I can remember. Now let me add this up here. Kim's full name is Kim Alysha Cayago. Between her first and last name, Kim Cayago, there are two a's. That fits hint one. Farkle and I were well aware of her middle name. Fits hint two. Her full name, Kim Alysha Cayago, has 4 a's in it. Fits hint three. Not white or black. She's from the Philippines. Fits hint four. She's not in Riley's homeroom class. Fits hint five. Currently, I have five reasons to believe it's her. Now I'm not done here. The fact that Riley referred to her as "they" instead of "him" was rather odd and would only make sense if she were referring to a girl. Because let's be honest, nobody's buying the whole she just does that when talking about certain people. That's the lamest and dumbest, clearly not thought out excuse I've ever heard. So the only logical explanation is she wasn't referring to a guy at all, and it clearly wasn't an alien so that also proves my theory. Let's go back to the day she told me everything that happened between them. She said even though she hates Kim, she wanted her to like her. It's not at all like Regina and Cady from Mean Girls because Cady wasn't hiding a secret "crush/desperate friend" thing from Regina. So the fact that she wanted her to like her also proves my theory. Because if Riley thought of her as an average friend, she wouldn't care if she liked her while they were fighting. I'm actually in a fight with a friend from school right now and I don't want that girl to like me. I did when we weren't fighting, but we are now so I don't like her, I don't want her to like me. Duh. So, point proven. I have like almost ten reasons to believe what I believe. Farkle told me we don't know for sure who it is. How much evidence do I have to believe it isn't Kim? Zero. That's right, I said zero. None! None at all! I have not one reason to believe it isn't! I was telling Farkle this earlier: say if someone was guessing your crush and they guessed a random person that isn't actually it. If it isn't actually that person you would fight HARD to make sure nobody thinks it is. Say if Farkle liked let's just say Sarah. If someone guessed his crush as let's say, Jessica. If someone asked him if it was Jessica, and he said no, and they said "I know it actually is Jessica" Farkle would freak out and say "no no no! I swear it actually isn't! Please believe me, it's actually not!" or something along those lines. He wouldn't say "whether it is or isn't, it doesn't matter" because if it actually isn't that person nobody would say "whether it is" boom! That's it. "Whether it is." If you don't like them you would never include those words! It's common sense! It's human nature! Just like if someone guessed your crush wrong you would freak out and make sure they know it's not that person! And back to what I said a bit earlier, Riley said "whether it is or isn't Kim, who cares!?" proves once again, I am right about it being her. Now I have legitimately about eight reasons to believe it's Kim. No reasons to believe it's not.
I have to admit something I never thought I'd ever admit to anyone. I cried last night when I became sure it was Kim and I couldn't stop crying. Farkle was confused because he didn't know what I'm about to tell you. He dragged me into the bathroom and asked me what the hell is going on. I told him. The way Riley feels about "Kim" is exactly how I feel about her. I thought it was a boy, a crush. I support Riley's love life with Lucas, Harry and all her crushes to the end. Episodes me did and I would now too. I supported her with Harry (we were fighting most of the time she liked him but I wasn't against the relationship) and I supported her with Kyle. Kim isn't a guy! She wouldn't be replacing Farkle. FARKLE! She would be replacing me. That's why I cared so much that it was Kim. That's why I wanted to know it wasn't. Because I was at peace when I believed she was just shoving Kim's name in my face to make me mad or jealous or whatever. I was at peace when she liked a guy. I was at peace when she loved me as her best friend. Now I'm not at peace. Unless I know for sure that it's not Kim, I will not be at peace. I need to know to feel at peace. I'm not at peace. I love Riley no matter how much I hate her. I want her to like me and I wanted us to be us again. I wanted to sleep next to her at our sleepovers and I wanted to be her first friendship priority again. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I wish she'd like Harry again. Even Lucas would do! Just not stupid Kim.. Anyone else, any guy! I know I sound desperate but if you were glued to someone for 8 years and they always had your back that entire time then replaced you with the first available friend, you'd be desperate too. Don't you dare judge me. Another reason I'm right just came to mind. Farkle and Smackle were forcing me to tell them who I "like" one night and I said I didn't want to. I usually tell Farkle everything. I said I didn't want him to judge me. Keep that word in mind. He asked why it was different than me liking Lucas or Josh. Because I didn't think it was a "crush" and I wasn't sure what it was, actually. I told him I didn't want him to judge me, which is odd because Farkle would never judge me and has never given me a reason not to trust that he won't. But I never felt that much love for a girl before. If I loved someone that much, it was a guy, a crush. Not a girl. It's not me though, it's Riley. I'm not bisexual or whatever. I'm not. Girls in general aren't attractive in my eyes. It's just Riley. And I don't even think I mean it like that. I wouldn't want to do the whole thing me and Lucas or her and Farkle did last year. That would be weird. That's too crush-ish. That's not what it is. I wouldn't wanna do that with Riley. Like ever. That's disgusting. It's not that I wouldn't wanna sleep next to her, because I have before, it's just that I would never do that with her. That's a boy-girl thing. I don't know what it is, but it might be the whole best friends thing because I know it's more than the average friend. I cannot believe I'm actually admitting this out loud. I never thought I would. I told Farkle last night though. Once one person knows, I don't see the point in hiding it from anyone anymore, especially because you never really know who they've told. My point is, I see Riley the way she sees "Kim" and that's why it hurt so bad.
So I still believe it's Kim and will until I have proof it isn't. I'm still upset by it and now you know why. I was right about something for once. That'll never happen again.. Wow. Thanks for reading and I hope you all have a good night. Watch Girl Meets World on Disney Channel. New episode February 12th.
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