May Contain Sexual Content

Hey, I know the title sounds pretty darn weird, but when I tell you what happened tonight when I went swimming with Auggie, Angela, Ben, Ava, Riley, Farkle and the other one, you'll understand why I would give this post such a strange title. We are on our trip to Riley's family's house who live 3 hours away from here. So, we went swimming at the pool there. Okay, so when we got there, we split up into 2 teams of 4. So, Riley, Farkle, Ava and Auggie went together. Leaving me, Angela, Ben and you know...the other one who I very strongly dislike. So, then Lucas and Angela were forcing me to go swimming where my feet can't touch the bottom. I told Angela that I was in swimming lessons and I was on Swimmer 5 but Lucas knew I never learned. So, he still forced me to go in and literally pulled me into the water, knowing I couldn't swim. Thanks for attempting to drown me, Lucas! So, then me and Angela got split up from Ben and Lucas and me and Angela were gonna go down the small slide. Then I said "I don't wanna go" because I was scared of the deepness of the pool at the bottom. "Maya! Maya! Maya!" Angela kept shouting loudly. "Okay, you don't need to say my name so much, I would rather you not" I said. "Maya! Maya! Maya!" 3 kids, 2 girls and a boy who were 2 feet away from us yelled. They heard that I didn't wanna go in so I was sitting on the edge, about to go down by the force of Angela and then the boy, motioned at Angela, asking if he could push me and Angela nodded her head in excitement. So, he pushed me down and I screamed and I thought I was gonna drown, until I felt my feet on the bottom. I stood up and looked up at them with the "What the heck!?" look on my face. So, then for a while they kept pushing me down all the time. Then one of the girls, asked for a piggy-back and I carried her back up to the slide. "What's your name?" she asked Angela. "Angela, what is yours?" Angela said. "Bryce" she said. "And that's my brother Liam" she said about the boy. "What's her name?" I asked about the other girl. "Umm, I forgot what her name was" Bryce said. "What's your name?" we all kept asking her. "I'm not telling" she said. We all kept nagging her to tell us her name. She wouldn't tell us so we called her 'Someone' for a while. "Fine, it's Maryanne" she said. "Maryanne?" I questioned. "Yes! finally someone got it right, nobody ever does" she said. "How old are you Bryce?" I asked. "I'm nine" she said. "Oh, I'm twelve" I said. "I'm eleven" Liam said. "I'm almost twelve" Maryanne said. "I'm seven" Angela said. She was the youngest by far. Adventually, I told Bryce the truth, that I can't actually swim. I told her not to tell Angela. So, she didn't. She was happy that I told her and we just met and I didn't tell Angela, who I have known for over a day now. So, then Maryanna asked if I could tell her. When Angela went way ahead, I told her. Then Maryanne had to go home, so it was me, Bryce, Liam and Angela. Then Bryce found a lifejacket floating in the water and put it on like a diaper. She was floating around for a while in it. "Maya, wanna get a diaper?" she asked me. "Yeah!" I said trying to fit in, even though I found her very strange. "Me too" Angela agreed. So, we all went to the lifejacket stand and got lifejackets, except for Angela who didn't want one. Then me and Bryce got in trouble by the lifeguard and we had to take off our diapers/lifejackets. So, then we put them on like normal lifejackets. Then we lost Liam and Angela and they were off on their own. Me and Bryce played together for a while. She hooked her lifejacket to mine and we floated around. Then we said it was like we were attached by an ambilical cord and I was like "So were twins?" she said, "No, the mom is attached to the baby" and then we both said "Eww!" Then we both agreed that we were just twins. So, then we went into a bench area and sat down. Then we saw Liam and Angela and they came over to us. Liam told Bryce to jump off the edge while I sat down so when she jumped, I would fall with her. After a while of her doing that, Liam wanted me to jump, but I was scared of drowning and I told Bryce that. "I need to talk to Maya in private" Bryce said leading me away with our so called ambilical cord. "Okay, do you think you can jump?" Bryce asked me. "Uhh, I guess" I said. "If you need help or get scared, just say the word "go" and I will help you" she said. "Okay" I agreed. We went back to Liam and Angela. "Maya's gonna jump" she said. I stood up and jumped only a little bit, Bryce didn't even fall. "You suck" Liam said in a joking way. "I didn't wanna fall and drown" I said. So, then Liam wandered off and this is where the title comes in. I'm not gonna tell you all of what she did, but I will tell you some of it. Some of it is just too weird to talk about. So, Bryce, she backed up and put her back on the jetts in the pool. So, then she said like "Haaaa" so relaxed. "That feels good" she said. "Uh huh" I said strangely. Oh, but what I didn't know was that wasn't even close to the weirdest part. Then she backed up her butt onto the jett and said "That feels even better, it's getting to my vagina" she said. "You should try it" she said. "Why would I do that?" I said almost throwing up in my mouth. The kid is nine, you would expect less sexual content outta her. "Because it feels sooo good" she said. I made a disgusted face and turned my head, and almost threw up. That is not even close to the worst part either. I'm not gonna tell you anything else she did because it is uncomfortable to talk about. So, check back again soon on The 99 Problems of Maya Hart.